I’m learning it’s okay if we don’t have it all together.
I ran into a friend of mine yesterday and we had a good talk. He asked me hard questions…questions I haven’t had to answer honestly in a long time. He asked questions like “How is life?” and “How is your walk?” and “Are you being poured into?” Not to pry, but because he genuinely cared. And I could tell. It was obvious.
He patiently waited for me to answer in whatever way I could muster.
The truth is, life just plain stinks sometimes and things aren’t always okay.
I don’t have it all together. I’ve had a rough 4-5 months. I try so hard to encourage and motivate others but I haven’t even been able to encourage and motivate myself.
To be completely honest, I haven’t felt like myself. I’ve felt alone, guilty, frustrated, discouraged, ashamed, embarrassed, and regretful.
- Alone because I don’t feel like anyone understands what I’m going through.
- Guilty for not feeling the way everyone expects me to feel all the time.
- Frustrated because it seems nothing I do is ever good enough.
- Discouraged because I don’t really like where God has me right now.
- Ashamed because I haven’t felt like reading God’s word or going to church, so I haven’t.
- Embarrassed because I haven’t handled my struggles the way I should.
- Regretful for not having spoken up sooner.
I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel sorry for me (I don’t want or need that). I’m telling you this because it’s the honest truth and I know I’m not the only one. I feel like I have to have it all together all the time but I can’t and I don’t.
Do you feel that way sometimes? Like you have to have your life together 24/7? That it’s not okay to struggle? And if you are struggling, you just need to try harder and do better?
When people ask me how things are going blogging/speaking-wise, I feel like I’m supposed to have this awesome update.
Things are the same.
Actually, I take that back.
Things aren’t the same.
They’ve slightly digressed and I feel like I’m walking backwards.
And no, I’m not giving up.
I’ve just hit a rough patch.
Because I’m human and I’m broken.
Life isn’t always good. It’s not always enjoyable either. There are seasons we go through that hurt really bad and there are times when we don’t have it all together.
I’m finally learning IT’S OKAY to be struggling. IT’S OKAY to not be okay. But tell someone. Be honest about what you’re going through. You don’t need to walk through this alone.
Society (and the enemy) makes us feel like we’re the only ones struggling but we’re not. And we’re not crazy or worthless or weak because we’re having a hard time.
We’re just human.
I’m guilty of holding everything in and pretending everything is okay even though it’s not. I place unrealistic expectations and unnecessary pressure on myself to have it all together, all the time.
I don’t know if it’s pride or insecurity or what, but I’m realizing it’s not healthy. Letting things build up inside us without seeking help from our loved ones can be detrimental.
Open up about what you’re going through.
Give yourself permission to struggle and feel what you’re feeling.
Life just plain stinks sometimes.
Even Jesus told His disciples upfront, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).
Life is going to get hard at times. We will, inevitably, face troubling times. We’ll cry and our hearts will ache. But even during our struggles, we can rejoice in the fact that God loves us and intends to use our circumstances to shape us and prepare us for His Kingdom.
Let’s stop being so hard on ourselves and start showing ourself some grace.
It’s OKAY to not be okay.
I don’t have it all together.
You don’t have to either.
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